So many guys I’ve met said that they don’t know how to flirt. In this article, you are going to learn how to flirt.
Not only will you learn about the golden rules of flirting, you will also understand how to inject higher status signals in a woman’s mind.
This is one of my all time favorite ways to interact with women, because it positions you as a charmer.
In fact, it could even be said that I got women instantly sprung simply by flirting.
Look at these messages, you’ll notice that you can apply verbal game to texting quite easily.
It’s going to take practice to get to the level of sexual tension, however, flirting definitely creates attraction!
Most men do not take the time to flirt, they just go for numbers when no attraction is built.
This results in rejection. Women will even give you numbers but have no intention to text you back.
Flirting is hands down the most effective way to build strong attraction so that she can see your personality.
You will figure out after reading this that in order to get numbers that stick, flirting is the missing link.
I’m going to give you rules and levels of flirting throughout this article.
First rule of flirting you must understand, that is communicate clarity of intent.
Now, I want to first tell you about becoming higher status.
So let’s get down in to the principles that REALLY matter! Remember this brother, higher status flirting means show masculinity.
The first thing you must understand about becoming higher status is the all important principle of leading.
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How To Become Higher Status
As a general principle in dating, women are attracted to the leader of men.
Now to be clear, status is not just about connections, social status, and power.
Which means the goal is not to become the president of the United States. Fuck politics, it causes arguments, no attraction.
First rule to becoming higher status, your mindset and self-esteem must be higher value.
Why is this important? Because you cannot flirt with women on the level of status if you are only her friend.
To be clear, when you are the leader of men, it also doesn’t mean you are a true genuine asshole.
I’ll say this quickly, you can be an attractive asshole, that is you want to be masculine and assertive.
The unattractive asshole has a taker mentality and want’s to one-up others for it’s own gain.
Simply have healthy intentions when you flirt, not unhealthy intentions.
Brother, use common sense because what I am teaching you about is powerful, don’t mis-use this.
Have integrity, don’t be a fucking creep. So let’s talk about frame control.
You must understand frame control and having social power in the environment you are in.
Second rule to becoming higher status, you demonstrate a bold, masculine, dominant frame.
Frame control is awesome. I’ll briefly describe it. Your reality is number one and it’s very strong.
Never let people get in to your frame, have your own instead. You don’t give a fuck what people think of you.
You are independent of the good and bad opinions that people have of you.
Why do you want to have a strong frame? Because this is the essence of masculinity.
Having a strong frame means you lead interactions effortlessly and you let people be themselves.
Want to learn all about frame control? Check out my book on Amazon to become a Jedi-Master at frame control.
Third rule to becoming higher status, you train your state of mind to feel positively good at all times.
I cannot stress this part enough. Women are attracted to a man that brings her state up and not down.
Hold women up to your level and demonstrate that you have complete control of your state.
When you are able to control your state in the midst of social pressure, all of YOU gets to show up!
Be fully authentic, you fully present, you are fully aware and completely on your inner balance point!
Rule in higher status flirting – demonstrate positive emotional stimulus.
How you do that is by frame controlling your state of mind.
Don’t overcomplicate this, just simply learn to be your higher status self by being calm and composed.
Higher Status Flirting Requires Alpha Confidence
If you want to understand flirting, then you must have the confidence of an alpha male.
You don’t need to fake it either. Simply be in your most positive state you can put yourself in.
That’s why controlling your state is of top priority. I’m going to give you an easy way to develop confidence.
I want you to meditate to binaural beats from brain.fm. Why?
Because it has binaural beats PROVEN to get your brain to enter in a state-of-mind where you are completely present and in the moment.
I wouldn’t recommend this if it’s complete shit.
Let me tell you something, some of my best nights where I went with the flow, I meditated to brain.fm beforehand.
I had a shitty night from losing a job one night year’s ago and then I said fuck it.
I’m not letting my state be down anymore. I researched the best music to meditate to.
And I got a free trial with brain.fm, and realized after listening to it that I felt surprisingly positive.
I felt like fucking Buddha when I finished my meditation. This is REALLY good shit.
When you are present and in the moment, you aren’t so self-monitoring. That’s what you want.
You don’t want to appear like you’re stiff and look uptight. Meditation even raises your confidence.
So why is having confidence so damn important? Because women test you and they see you’re insecurities.
When you are confident and you are higher status, they literally cannot affect you, not even their looks.
When a women see’s a man that is non-reactive in high stakes, and can remain strong in his frame, she literally wants your attention.
Alpha male attention is one of the most valuable hits of validation that a woman always wants.
When a women is validated by a higher status, confident, alpha male, she gets turned on.
Flirting becomes easy and you can reach sexual tension very quickly!
Master The Art of Higher Status Body Language
This is another important principle in dating and social dynamics, however, there’s A LOT to it.
So let me simplify this for you: Be open, grounded, composed, slow-and-controlled.
When it comes to body language, just taking up space is very powerful.
However, one of the most important point to having higher status body language is to be relaxed, not anxious.
You will see that having the calibration to read non-verbal cues is how you can screen for her interest.
The biggest tip I can give you on body language is to simply be comfortable and less guarded.
Be slow, controlled, calm, cool, and collected. Ground your body and take up space.
I am going to give you great lines to use, however, it’s really the energy behind it that matters more.
Because lines are useless if you are off in your delivery. This is why you must work on being higher status.
The psychology behind the lines will actively make her attracted and want more of your attention.
So before we continue, grab a copy of my book on Amazon, because it’s THAT damn important to read.
Why? Because I teach you how to make your body language look higher status and authoritative.
One last thing before we get in to the good shit…
Don’t act obnoxious with your body language because this is what I did first learning game.
I learned this the hard way seven years ago when I had a woman tell me..
“You think you’re hot shit with how high you raise your chest?” Yeah, true story.
This is a newbie mistake. Believe me, you don’t want to hear this from a woman.
Convey, do not say. You want to be subtle, not so damn obvious.
But don’t overthink it either, then you look like you’re trying too hard.
How To Flirt Using Push/Pull
Let’s get in to the good shit. This is called Push/Pull and it’s a polarizing way to flirt with a woman.
Why? Because Push/Pull is how you are going to play hard-to-get with a woman.
This is one of the first and fundamental ways of flirting.
So many times men have been played by woman when they show mixed signals.
This is basically you showing mixed signals back at her!
Let’s say for example you meet a woman named Jessica. This is a great push/pull comment you can say
“It’s been fun chatting you up tonight Jessica.” This is a Pull statement, meaning you pull her in.
“It’s too bad I’m not attracted to you.” This is a Push statement. Now you are higher status.
Why? Because so many guys have too much pull in their game.
This is going to position you as hard-to-get. How many guys push women away? Not many.
It’s time that I introduce to you the power of CHALLENGE.
Why is it that challenge is so damn powerful? It’s because it amplifies desire on an emotional level.
All humans are naturally attracted to the person that which is out-of-grasp.
That’s why Push/Pull is very powerful in amplifying attraction.
One of my favorite push/pull statements I used often at the bars and nightclubs..
“You know you’re fun to talk to, it’s too bad I’m THAT attracted to you.” Change your tone when you say “THAT attracted to you.” Then wink at her.
But here’s where guys fuck-up. It’s when you are off in your line delivery.
Honestly, I don’t care if you are a good looking dude. I am a good looking dude. I learned this the hard way.
Put Brad Pitt in the room and he say’s that push/pull line sounding like a robot, it won’t work.
Meaning she won’t get attracted to you even if you are good looking.
It’s time that I give you some more powerful valuable lines we move on to false disqualifiers.
Listen brother, you MUST have a witty tonality, deliver this next push/pull statement with wit. Be funny man.
“You and I might not get along, but you don’t seem THAAT boring.” Put some energy in to it!
Another great push/pull line I’ve used and it’s worked because I was in the flow state and I meditated..
“You’re name is Hannah? I usually get a long with girls named Hannah, it’s too bad I’m not that in to you..” pause and wink then say “yet.”
Assholes push too much. Nice guys pull too much. Find your middle line.
How To Flirt Using False Disqualifiers
I love falsely disqualifying women, did I just say that? Yep, I did. I don’t fucking care, neither should you.
This is a step above push/pull because it requires more confidence. When I said meditate, I mean it.
Here’s what I want you to understand, when you flirt, you must drop all expectations of outcome.
It’s all about throwing spaghetti on the wall and seeing what sticks.
I am going to share with you what sticks, but remember, be fun and a challenge.
“You know you have an amazing smile, the fourth best I’ve seen all night. Congratulations on earning the fourth best smile award.” LOL
Did I mention I used that one on Emily my current partner? She loved it and cracked up.
Rule in flirting, don’t tease her unless you know she’s attracted.
Women are drawn to good, positive emotional stimulus. Take that to the bank.
“Do you have twenty-inch spinning rims on your car? Because if you don’t, we can’t be friends.”
Mark Sing, you’re a legend for teaching me that one. Smack yourself on the ass.
Do you see how this works? You are falsely pushing her away in a fun and challenging way.
Here’s what assholes do, they come in with combative energy.
“It’s too bad you’re not my type because you are too freakin’ annoying.” WRONG PLAY.
Bro if you do this, you will give her negative emotional stimulus.
Let’s say she’s in med school, here’s what you say…
“I don’t get along with women like you, because I get a sense that you’d prescribe me the wrong drugs. You’re not a drug dealer are you?” RIGHT PLAY. Wink at her.
BOOM. She’s going to start qualifying herself to you if she’s already attracted.
Let’s say she’s a yoga instructor. And her name is Amy, for example sake.
“Ah shit I can’t believe you’re a yoga instructor, Amy. I don’t think we can be friends anymore.”
She say’s, “Why can’t we be friends?”
You say, “Because I’d hold crow pose longer than you and you’d get jealous, throw a yoga brick at my face and it would turn to be a fucking mess. It’s too bad because you’re kinda attractive.”
By the way, this may come across as cocky, however, you’ll find listening to my podcast, I absolutely love David D’Angelo.
This man is the legend who created cocky funny humor and this positions you as higher status in a woman’s mind.
This next scenario is dangerous for massive attraction. I strongly recommend you use it.
“So Jessica, I just realized something bad about you, even though you’re fun to talk to.”
This is Push/Pull. Did you catch that? Good.
She says “What did you realize? Tell me!”
Did I say Push/Pull amplifies desire? Damn straight, it’s very powerful.
You say, “I don’t think you can handle it. Might be too much for you.” DIRECT CHALLENGE.
She punches you on the arm. “Please tell me, I’ll buy you a drink.” QUALIFICATION.
You say, “You have this genuine vibe, but I get this feeling you’re very guarded around good looking men and when you meet them, you just don’t trust them do you?”
This is called cold reading and in my opinion, one of the most powerful ways to build massive attraction.
How To Flirt By Framing Her
We are diving in to seduction so now it’s time for you to be fully congruent.
You’ll notice by now why this is higher status flirting. Game requires you to grow and level up.
Life is all about frame control. Look around you, there is someone always leading the interaction.
You’d be wise to watch how people talk to each other, it’s called being frame aware.
The more you notice how people lead others, the better you can lead women.
And what better way to flirt with a women by making it look like she is seducing you?
It literally positions you as a charmer and a seducer. That’s why I love this sequence.
Just knowing this, you now have the power to see frame control is the fundamental backbone of all social interactions.
I put this in my upcoming book about to be released Closer’s Guide to Seduction. Stay tuned 😉
“Come on Nicole, you’ve gotta stop hypnotizing me with those eyes. Do you pull this on all of the guys? Why are you being so damn seductive in a public setting? It’s inappropriate Nicole.”
Did I mention I said this to a lot of women? Shoot me, I don’t care. I just love it so damn much.
She will something like, “You keep looking at me like that.”
“Nah, I knew you were trouble the minute I met you. If you keep doing this to me, I’m going blush that my cheeks will get so red and it will be all your fault!”
She’ll most definitely test you, “You’re such a player. I’m not doing anything.”
Pass her test effortlessly by saying..
“I’m flattered you think I’m a player. You know you’re sooo adorable when you try so hard to get attention.”
This is one of my all time favorite ways to flirt with women. I love women, you should too.
But learn to control yourself because they can tell when you’re being try-hard.
These lines are great, but if it comes from a place of having a taker mentality…
You are highly unattractive. Rule in higher status flirting, don’t try so hard to get her.
Flirting With Your Eyes is How To Charm Women
First tip before you advance up to the level of sexual tension.
Go up to a mirror and practice your eye contact. Yes, stare at yourself. I mean that.
Get yourself in a sexy mood. Let me tell you something, states are contagious, it’s literally been proven.
Do me a favor and say “I love you brother, you’re my hero.”
Your eye contact is of top priority. Don’t look around anxiously. You look like a spaz when you do.
In order for this to work, you must accept your sexuality fully. Don’t have shame surrounding it.
I’ve seen ugly guys pull women simply because they accept themselves.
Higher status flirting requires you learn to dilate your pupils. Do this by practicing your flirtatious eye contact.
Now this is where I tell you about pacing and leading. LISTEN UP!
I am not responsible for you dropping this at the wrong time.
You have to learn to read her interest and disinterest. Quite frankly, I’ve witnessed women get mad.
Why do they get mad? Because I saw guys get too sexual too soon. Stop this crap.
Rule in higher status flirting – screen for interest signs.
Here are a few, touching her hair, licking her lips, feet pointed to you, and her pupils dilate.
Pacing is powerful, it’s misused a lot so bro, make sure she’s invested in you!
Here’s what you say, bear in mind, this takes having congruence and social calibration.
“You seem like a woman with a very high sex drive…”
Stay quiet. Let the tension build.
Then if you have compliance and she agrees, say the next line.
“You love it when a man that can take you through this amazing experience where you can let go, be feminine, and trust in his lead…” Look at her with your bedroom eyes
“I’m here to tell you that you can have that experience, but we need to find you a man first.”
This is called a takeaway and believe me, I’ve seen how powerful this is. So have integrity man.
When you pace her reality, you tell her more about herself that she can verbalize.
Take that to the bank and cash the check.
Leading is frame control at its finest. Combine the two and this is evil shit, why do I say that?
Because it’s very slick, clever, and when done right, you can seduce her with this sequence.
Bear in mind, seduction is nonlinear. It’s literally unpredictable, it requires you to be in the flow state.
Higher Status Flirting Requires Congruence
This is where everything comes full circle. It’s time for you to be congruent and brave.
Why? Because you have to understand that all of game is literally you becoming your highest self.
I want you to start being prepared for guys to come up to the woman you’re talking to.
Why do you want to be prepared? Because it shows you are unafraid of conflict.
I recommend you jokingly put her on the spot, but come on now man! Do it when you know she can take a tease and isn’t hypersensitive.
Higher status flirting means that you are willing to go outside your comfort zone and push her away from you. This is often why assholes can be attractive, but don’t use a harsh tonality.
“Hey man, how do you feel about women who fart silently? Because I have an intuition this one will make your night much better.” HOLD YOUR FRAME. It just means be nonreactive.
Bold move, you’ll find that being polarizing is worth it if you’re willing to grow a pair.
Bro, I want you to start snapping women out of their trance when they stare in to their phones.
“HEY! YOU! I want to ask you a quick favor, can you watch my phone? Don’t go through it, you won’t be able to handle what you find in there.”
I literally have done this more times than I can count. Then I realized that these openers were ten times better than what most dating coaches say.
Why is it better? Because it’s unapologetic, it’s high risk, high reward.
You know how to get congruent? You talk to her with confidence and comfortable body language.
Next scenario, let’s say for example, you don’t drink. You have to own it and be congruent.
She says, “are you that boring that you don’t drink at bars?”
“Listen I know you want to get me drunk and get me in to your car, but relax, it’s not happening.”
Now here is where I want to suggest to you to be unafraid to be polarizing and vulnerable.
You talk about how male sexuality nowadays is incongruent as fuck. Yep I just went there.
“So Jessica, I take it your very annoyed of meeting guys that just doubt themselves. It’s like they’re ashamed of what they want in the bedroom.”
“Yeah, a lot of men are definitely like that.”
This is good, you want her to agree with you and comply. It’s time for you to change her state.
“I know it’s not the most manly thing to say this, but it’s my responsibility to be fully open with you.”
Here, this is your time to pause and let the tension build. Dropping this next line will change her state.
“It all starts with knowing yourself. And knowing what it is that you want. Sometimes I like to take a break from the dominant sex, and have deep, loving, emotional sex.”
You do realize that being unapologetic requires that you be brave right? It’s taking action in spite of fear. You’ll find that having courage in this game is sexy. But don’t do it too soon.
Say it with The Sincere Tone. What does that mean? It means you want to sound genuine.
Rule in flirting – initiate touch and read her comfort levels.
This is by far the most important part of flirting is your touch, on top of having strong eye contact.
You see the way this sequence is played out is you have to make sure she’s invested and attracted.
And then you drop it when you feel that she has qualified herself to you.
That is how you make her feel that she has earned your vulnerability.
Higher Status Flirting Summary
I love flirting, you should love it too. As long as you are comfortable and you are fully congruent, you won’t creep her out. How do you not be creepy? State your intentions in a comfortable way.
And I want you to slowly work your way up to the more advanced levels of flirting, because stating your intentions doesn’t mean that you get sexual super fast. Have common sense.
Read her attraction levels and start out with push/pull when you see she’s invested. Then as she gets hot for you, it’s time for you first just communicate sexual intent with your eyes.
This is how to screen her for disinterest. If she’s not in to you from the flirting you’ve done, let it go man. Like I said be independent of the good and bad opinions of others, it’s all good.
Now that you know the levels of flirting and the rules of flirting, it’s time for you to take action. Start flirting with women. Don’t want to be sexual so soon? Take out the touch element of flirting.
But if you’re ready to advance in your game, I recommend you utilize the power of kino touch and flirting with her with your eyes. Then start flirting verbally when you see she’s invested in you.
Women want to feel your masculine presence, that is to say, you demonstrate a very powerful frame with confidence and congruence. Don’t be that unattractive ego-driven asshole.
This is why I strongly recommend that you meditate to binaural beats. Because it gives you the ultimate advantage over all of the other guys that try to flirt but you can tell they are in their head.
This is the last and most important rule to flirting – get out of your head. It’s a dangerous place to be in when you talk down on yourself. Women can intuitively tell when you talk down on yourself.
The next thing I will mention before I ditch out is you have to be willing to be unapologetic when you flirt. That means own you’re insecurities and accept them. All of that said, now you can flirt effortlessly!
If you want to elevate your flirting game and make her crave you sexually, watch this short video because it will be taken down by midnight.
Let me know in the comments section if you want me to write about confidence and owning who you are. In the mean time, you can contact me at adamskoda@masculinemindsetcoach.com.
See you flirtatious legends next time, you handsome stud 😉
