January 31

Pacing and Leading 101: What It Is and How To Use It PROPERLY


Have you ever wanted to get in to quick rapport with women? Do you know what pacing and leading is? If you don't know what this is, then by the end of this article, I intend to tell you what pacing and leading and how to use it for healthy intentions. 

I want to make this very clear, you must never use any of these cold reads that I am giving you today for malicious intentions. You should never use them too soon. More importantly, let's get to the most important point to this entire article....

Trending: How To Get a Girl Obsessed With You

Have A Good Heart When Using Pacing and Leading with Women

I am trusting you to use everything I give you for good. Yes, my readers already know how much I talk about darker topics in the dating field.

However, pacing and leading genuinely can work extremely well, not to mention you may have a stalker on your hands if you use the strawberry fields gambit on women that are completely blown away with how intuitive you are. 

SPEAKING FROM EXPERIENCE. Please do not use pacing and leading for the wrong reasons. Don't use the gambit I'm revealing to you on emotionally incapable women. Everything I am telling you today, I genuinely know how fucking powerful these sequences are. 

I've had girls stalk me, and they even would call me so fucking much, and I realized that these women got super attracted by just using the Strawberry Fields gambit. So let's get started, shall we? 

Pacing Equals Rapport

Always remember that pacing equals rapport, pacing her reality means you demonstrate an understanding of her world. Leading is masculinity at its finest. In my work of Become The Alpha Women Want, I touch upon the three step process:

  • Attraction
  • High Status Conversations
  • Pacing and Leading

Little do all of you know that when pacing and leading is done in the most powerful way possible, you can get women to fall REALLY fast for you. 

Why? Because you demonstrate an understanding her world. This is PRECISELY why I must ask all of you to be NATURAL the way you deliver the sequences I give you throughout this article. Take inspiration from the monologues I give you, but don't focus on being perfect, be NATURAL. 

You'll notice that pacing and leading goes hand-in-hand with cold reading. I'm no longer offering my FREE evil cold reads anymore, because I'm giving you the cold reads I know to be the most effective in this article. 

Always Come From a Place of Power

You must be relaxed, coming from a place of power when delivering these cold reads. Let's get down to seven ways to pace and lead.

One last note before I forget, the best way for you to get REALLY good at cold reading and pacing and leading, it requires you to be present to the moment.

Don't be TOO focused on how you present yourself. Don't be TOO focused on if you are pacing and leading. This puts you in your head. Cold reading requires you to be present and THERE with her.

Deep Rapport Cold Read

Let's say you meet a cute brunette gal in Los Angeles, and you want to get in to quick rapport with her, not waste any time. I like that, you're like me...

Get to know them fast. Here's what you do, verbalize her motivations and purpose behind her dreams. I'm telling you, this is super powerful with girls. 

"So you're a brown-eyed tan skinned 26 year old single woman in the big starry eyed city of Los Angeles chasing her dreams <Pacing> I know it's kind of a deep thing to say, but I'm willing to bet you've asked yourself, why am I really doing this? <Leading>"

Have you heard my cold reading masterclass podcast? Click the link, you can hear me saying this cold read. 

This is effective because you are getting her to open up when you pace first, then you start leading the interaction. This is why my first dating eBook is so heavily focused on leading interactions naturally.

Pacing and Leading Her Past

"It must be tough for you out there..."

Now, just takeaway attention after you deliver this.

She will ask, "What?" Or maybe she might say, "What do you mean?"

You respond...

"Well it's not like you're out there looking for a man <pacing>, but obviously, you'd like to meet one if it happened. It's kinda like every guy is impressively uninteresting or a douchebag. But once in awhile, you meet one who seems interesting but all of the losers in your past make you question him. <Leading>"

Do you get what pacing and leading is now? You build quick rapport when you hit the nail on the head with what her dating life is like. 

Say to her... "Do you want my input?"

By now, you are going to get her curious, so she will want your input.

"Trust your instincts. We've all had shit happen to us in our past but letting that cloud your judgement about someone new and interesting would be unfair to him and you."

Polarizing Cold Read

I love this one, it's so much fun. It's on my episode 3 Powerful Cold Reads to Turn Her On INSTANTLY.

To be clear, you've be natural when you deliver this one and say it coming from a place of power...

"You know, you seem like an adventurous woman, like you're opening to trying new things, and you often go with the flow. Even though you have a normal job, you're normally happy with it for the most part <Pacing> It's obvious, its written all over your face, but there is a part of you that MOST DEFINITELY knows that there more for you out there <Leading> So I'm curious, what the fuck are you going to do about it?"

Fucking love this one. I heart it so much. It's very effective. So write this down. 

Notice how pacing and leading is a component to cold reading.

Pacing and Leading Her Sex Drive 

"You seem like you have a high sex drive..."  Cold Reading

Let the tension build from here. Framing her for loving sex...

That's high status flirting well done.

No matter what feedback she gives you, if you hold your frame, you win.

"Yeah like when you're with a guy that you're attracted to and comfortable with, you want him to take the lead and fuck him all the time, don't you?"

At this point, she will be very turned on. Lead this to Strawberry Fields Gambit

Strawberry Fields

"Have you ever played strawberry fields before?"

She might say, "No, what's that?"

You say, "It's a fun psychological test that my friend told me about that analyzes your personality. My friend Hannah shared this with me. You ready to play?"

She says, "Yes, sounds intriguing."

You lead the gambit my friend...

"Just follow what I say and close your eyes. Imagine that you are walking on a sunny autumn day, it's fall and the leaves are pretty. You come up to a strawberry field. Now imagine a fence around that field. How high is the fence?"

She responds, "Like eight feet." 

You respond, "That tells me a lot about you. Now imagine you go past that fence, you see yourself in this field, how many strawberries would you pick and eat?"

She says, "I will take 8 strawberries."

You lead and say, "I knew you were trouble. Now what about the farmer, what does he have to say about you being a strawberry thief?"

She says, "He doesn't give a fuck, he says, 'take it.' I have plenty more."

You finish up and say, "Open your eyes. Do you want to know what all that means about you?"

She says, "Yes. Tell me."

"How high the fence is is actually a metaphor for how ambitious you are. And how likely you are to achieve your goals. Some girls I've talked to say it's at twelve feet, they've set their goals too high, but you, you chose eight feet. It's not too high, nor is it too low. It's like the perfect height. You know it's a challenge to achieve goals <point to yourself> but you can still get it. Might take some work though." ;-))

Keep going and tell her about the strawberries. 

"The strawberries are one of the most sensual fruits in the world. It's actually a metaphor for sex. So how many you took is how high your sex drive is. And the farmer, that's a metaphor for what society thinks about you having a sex drive. You do your own thing, which tells me you know what you want <point at yourself>."

Listen brother, do you want to know why this will turn her on?

When you pace her reality, you tell her more about herself than what she can verbalize. She see's you as the higher status Alpha Male. 

Hot Girl Cold Read

"Do you ever meet someone and it's like... you get them almost right away? <Pacing>

Again remember, you want to build that rapport. This works on all hot girls. 

Giving credit to an old school pick-up artist, Brad P. 

Legendary PUA, he is badass.

"I can tell with you, I bet you meet a lot of guys but you find almost none of them interesting. And then when you finally meet one who is interesting, you get excited about it for a little while, but you find out for yourself losing interest in him too and you don't know why." <Leading>

Believe me, this fucking works on all hot girls. 

She'll probably say, "How did you know? You're very intuitive."

"Just a gut feeling. I get it though. I feel the same way with girls. I don't know why no one meets my standards." Smirk at her.

The Bottom Line

F Formula Review

Pacing and leading I cover extensively in my second dating eBook. However, what you must understand is it must be done naturally. 

Never TRY to pace and lead interactions. When you try too hard, it plays the opposite effect. 

This is how pacing and leading works, this is how to do it effectively. You can even throw in the strawberry fields gambit and it will add fire to the attraction you've already built with her. 

It's extremely powerful. First hand experiences, this works for one night stands, I want you to take action. 

Start flirting, start cold reading, and add in some pacing and leading. You'll skyrocket your attractiveness to women effortlessly. Feel comfortable to comment and questions below!

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