Are you wondering how to have a healthy ego, but more importantly, are you wondering how to not be too pushy with your arrogance?
This article is going to address that, but more importantly, I'm going to bring up one of my favorite topics when it comes to female psychology my friend.
Because in case you didn't know, the dark triad is something not enough people talk about because it's dark and people are afraid of this side of game and for good reason.
More importantly, in my upcoming book on Masculinity, I go in much greater detail on to why it's extremely important to know your dark side. If you don't know it, you won't be prepared for the repercussions of learning game.
However, this article is more about your mindset and how we can get you in to the mindset of a masculine man, because that is of course my specialty.
Understand that your dark side is an essential part of you. Ignore it and it will surface up in ways you don't want it to brother.
The Dark Triad of Personality
Brother, be prepared to have your earth shattered after reading this article because let me tell you something.
Because higher status self-love is so damn important to have, this can in essence make you seem so damn confident that you have traits of a psychopath.
As you know from my ultimate guide to pick-up, higher status self-love is key to have. That means you have got to have the certainty and confidence of a psychopath.
Wait, what the fuck Adam? I heard you say not to becoming a psychopath on one of your podcasts...
Yes, I did say this, however, the all important point is you gotta understand that there are certain qualities of narcissism and psychopathy that you must understand before I get in to the tactical tips on developing a healthy ego.
You must know about why a healthy ego requires you to have some traits of healthy narcissism. If you don't, then you're likely not going to develop a healthy ego, you'll have an unhealthy ego as a result.
More importantly, you must have the certainty of a psychopath. Why? Because this can and will eliminate approach anxiety.
There are tasks to complete on how to develop the certainty of a psychopath in my first book.
You can and you will realize very fast when you develop a strong frame that you will become more self-entitled than ever. That means you place your higher purpose as number one.
Nothing matters but your purpose, and you must NEVER compromise to get shit done to work towards your purpose.
Healthy Narcissism is Self-Entitlement
So here's the whole important point of the podcast in this article (that is if you listen to it all the way through.)
Self-entitlement stems from narcissism, and you must be aware of this proceeding forward. However, this can be healthy, that is if you don't go down the thought loop of attaching your ego to a million things (that I'm going to cover in a second.)
I want you to understand that the Ego is your dark side. Yes, my friend, it is your dark side. Everyone has a dark side. If you are looking to overcome the nice guy syndrome, this is how you do it. You get to know your dark side.
I must say something about having self-entitlement my friend, you can and you will most definitely take this advice starting out a little too far. You may think that what I'm suggesting is overboard, and it may even piss you off.
That's exactly what I'm here to do brother. I'm going to get you to see that you gotta be somewhat of a narcissist when you are rejected. Reframe all rejections as a learning lesson, more importantly, it's still a win.
Think of all rejections as laughable. People don't see what you have to offer? FUCK THEM. Move on. What I'm suggesting to you is to have the mentality of an asshole.
But that doesn't mean you become one if you don't want to be. Simply put, you must reframe rejection moving forward. If you can't do this due to low self esteem, I'm going to give you a task from my book Become The Alpha Women Want
LIST FIVE TO TEN THINGS GREAT ABOUT YOU
WRITE THIS DOWN IN A JOURNAL
This is a simple self-worth exercise my friend. If you cannot do this, then you aren't going to develop a healthy ego.
More importantly, it's really important that you know your path and no one can sway you off course.
I'm going to get in to the caveat to this entire article that you must understand...
Silence Your Ego When You Want to Say Something
"What the fuck? Why are you suggesting to silence my ego Adam if you want me to develop a healthy ego?"
These might be some of the questions you're asking yourself. And I get that this article may be rubbing you off the wrong way as you read on. The reason is your ego doesn't want to hear what I'm saying at all.
Your ego wants to be better than everyone. Yes, my friend, your ego, that MASSIVE brain of yours wants to claim superiority over others and as you know from my hater article, people hate because of ego's fighting against and hating against others.
In order to develop a healthy ego, do that task I said above from my book my dude. I'm telling you, this is the starting point of how to develop a healthy ego without becoming too arrogant.
One thing I must mention, if you ever want to build yourself up because you think you are better than someone else, step the fuck back and control yourself. When you do that, it is not a healthy ego at all, that is an unhealthy ego.
The same story from my hater article comes to my head, that guy who bragged about how many women he's been with. You see, that right there is when I said to myself, "Adam, don't say anything, he's young and trying too hard to be cool."
More importantly, don't believe everything you think brother. That's such a good quote from Doctor Wayne Dyer, I want to say that again...
"Don't believe everything you think." -Dr Wayne Dyer
A Healthy Ego is Self-Entitled
This is why in my podcast episode I cover healthy narcissism. Let's define narcissism brother...
Narcissism is defined by a sense of entitlement, dominance and a grandiose self-view.
And in case you didn't know this brother, this right here is taken from short term mating strategies research study.
Now obviously, in this study they found more than just self-entitlement such as exhibitionism, authority, superiority, etc.
You can check out the study from APA PsycNet.
As I say in the podcast if you listen to this is you clearly want balance because anything can be taken too far.
So here's the important point, keep your confidence to yourself brother, as if you verbalize your confidence, it shows that you are try hard to women.
Unhealthy Ego is Fake Confidence
I gotta repeat myself again as I say this in the podcast, when you verbalize confidence, it's fake confidence.
It's just like that guy we all see all the time that buys the most expensive suit in the world, and he thinks he's hot shit.
If you've been guilty of this, stop this bullshit, if you've read my dating articles, you know women see right through this.
An unhealthy ego is forced confidence and it comes across as try-hard. Stop being so fucking try-hard.
Women know when you try to impress them with shiny objects.
So all of you rich guys that are pissed off at me for saying this, I get it. I would be pissed off too.
Here's a hard reality for all of you rich guys, you will be used if you show women your resources too soon.
Women don't fuck guys that show off. They are repulsed by it. If you are naturally confident in yourself, you shouldn't have to prove it to anyone.
And that's the definition of arrogance. It's basically you exaggerating your assets to everyone else. If you want to develop a healthy ego without becoming arrogant, here's what you do my friend...
Shut The Hell Up About Your Income
FUCK, I made one hundred million dollars in my business! Damn, let's go show this to everyone! I want to spend this as quickly as possible so I can look cool and get in to the exclusive crowd.
The shit people think is cool nowadays makes me wonder how some stupid people are with their resources. Go ahead brother, be irresponsible, spend everything you make because you just want to look cool.
This is not a healthy ego and why it's I am starting out with money. It's because the level of ego with money in today's society is borderline idiotic.
Not to mention when you're around a grown, high quality woman, she's going to see that as you cannot control yourself with finances. Is that what you want people to see?
There's a reason why people who win the lottery end up broke all over again, it's because they have a broke person's mindset.
Shut The Hell Up About Your Game
You are good with women, nice brother. I commend you for that. In fact, that's spectacular. Keep flirting with women.
However, you don't need to do what is called flash game. This is a term I heard years ago when I studied pick-up.
What flash game is defined as is it looks like amazing in-field footage, but in reality, you are not taking her back to your place.
Don't brag about your game, instead you gotta shut up about your game. Because when you do this in front of women, they will get HIGHLY uncomfortable.
This comes back to silencing your ego when you want to flex up and try to claim superiority when you meet someone that appears to have better game than you.
Shut The Hell Up About Your Muscles
I will fully own that this is the one I have struggled with the most throughout my life. And just recently, I had ego death in which I just stopped caring what anyone thinks.
Ego death requires an entire article that I don't have time to talk about right now. Let's just say daily meditation is very powerful and I no longer feel the need to workout for externalities.
Maybe it's because I do daily meditation just about everyday. Maybe it's also because I'm now in my 30s and I don't fucking care about muscles like I did when I competed in a fitness physique show and I thought it was cool to flex.
Really, I just enjoy working out because it's my identity. I've trained 100 people and that's what I will attach my ego to admittedly. Because I believe I am the fucking best at what I do.
However, I encourage you to meditate. It's very powerful and there's no reason why you don't have time to do it as we all have the same 24 hours in a day.
The Final Verdict
So here's what we can conclude my friend, there are many different philosophies from spiritual teachers and this is what I know about developing a healthy ego.
Developing a healthy ego can give you a higher sense of self-entitlement, however, the ego can be insidious and come through the back door and its cunning.
The way you have a healthy ego is you keep your confidence natural and authentic. Don't try to show everything off. This is pure arrogance and it's not a good look.
Be on the lookout for this as anything that you feel threatens your ego. The biggest warning I gotta give you about the ego my friend is the ego is never fucking satisfied.
That means you will get bored easily. You'll get bored with your income. You'll get bored with the women you are seeing. You'll get bored with everything. Even the car you drive.
Make it a daily discipline to always do something out of the norm that you are not used to. Learn social skills, discover your masculine purpose, just don't sit around too long.
More importantly, just get yourself in to a masculine state of mind as this is what my blog is all about. Feel comfortable to comment below any takeaways. See you guys next time!