This article gives you very powerful ways to get a masculine mindset so I want to tell you something before proceeding…
Since I’m writing a book and I’ve been very busy with that, I’ve had so many people reaching out to me asking how they can show a masculine mindset and embody masculine traits such as strength, courage, and leadership without being aggressive, while still conforming to the expected attitudes imposed by society.
“How can I set boundaries? Why are people not taking me seriously? It’s like I try to speak up, but people ignore me. Adam, what gives? I want to be assertive, but no one is REALLY listening to me. It’s like they don’t give a shit.”
These are some of the comments I’m getting on my podcast. And quite frankly, I feel for you. Because a very long time ago, I thought these same exact things. Let’s get the truth out of the way so that you can understand something…
Masculinity: The Mind
Following your own path and your own lead gives you a masculine mindset. This is the single most important point to starting out developing your masculinity.
That goes without saying, you my friend must understand something, most people have their own shit going on. So what I mean by that is you have to realize that the way people view you is out of your control.
I have some people that paint this picture of me as being very dominant, and very aggressive. And I cannot control that. What you think of me is not my business.
I know that I have a VERY hard headed mentality, that comes from being a group fitness trainer and I know that you can get your head out of your own negative thoughts. That’s most definitely what people are picking up on.
Understanding your own gender identity and how it interacts with societal expectations is crucial for developing a masculine mindset that is true to yourself, rather than simply trying to match society’s definition of manhood.
They can call that aggressive all they want, and I’ll let them think that way. So if you think I’m aggressive, cool, that’s your opinion. I’m simply passionate about getting people in to an action-taking mindset.
Masculinity is a toward’s driven mindset. Look towards your goals, don’t look away from your goals.
Masculinity Means Don’t Take Shit Personal
I want to reference the book The Four Agreements and for good reason. This was the VERY first book I ever read at sixteen years of age. In fact, I was mentally in a bad place. However, this book helped me get out of my head about being dependent on other people’s BS.
Because let me tell you something, the second agreement is, “Don’t take anything personally.” If you want to learn all four, get the book on hardcover or audible.
It’s an amazing read. And honestly (at that time in my life) didn’t think a book could really help me at such an early age. I thought it was stupid. But then I realized how wrong I was.
Not only did this book give me a HUGE perspective shift, but it also helped me interact with others better.
I was able to see that the “smokey mirror” is in fact how we all perceive others to be is an illusion and we are all reflected in each other but most people cannot see this truth.
The Evolution of Traditional Masculinity
Masculinity has undergone significant changes over the centuries, influenced by cultural, social, and economic factors. In the Middle Ages, masculinity was closely tied to chivalry and the ideals of knighthood, emphasizing honor, loyalty, and bravery. Men were expected to be protectors and providers, embodying the virtues of a noble warrior.
Fast forward to the Industrial Revolution, and the concept of masculinity shifted towards industrial labor and the ability to provide for one’s family.
Men were seen as the breadwinners, working long hours in factories to support their households. This era solidified the notion that a man’s worth was tied to his ability to work and provide.
The 20th century brought about significant challenges to masculinity, particularly with the rise of the feminist movement. Gender roles were redefined, and the push for gender equality began to dismantle the rigid expectations placed on men.
How to Own Masculinity in Today’s Societal Expectations
Today, masculinity is evolving to incorporate more emotional and nurturing aspects. Men are encouraged to express their emotions and take on caregiving roles, breaking away from the stereotypically masculine ways of the past.
Research has shown that men who adhere strictly to traditional masculine norms are more likely to experience mental health issues, such as depression and anxiety. Instead, it’s best to express yourself freely. Men and women are not same.
The point is do not deny human emotions because it makes you human. Instead own masculinity but start living with an open heart at the same time. Be physically strong, keep working out because that increases masculine energy.
More importantly, men need to open up, and they need a brotherhood. Developing healthy relationship skills (active listening, communication, nonjudgmental support) all important to fostering healthy relationships. It’s okay to be vulnerable, just balance that with these strategies.
In this article, I’m going to give you 7 strategies to enhance your masculinity that encourage men to know who they are, discover their masculine purpose, and be the man women are drawn to.
First Strategy – Be Good Enough on Your Own
When you are mentally independent, not codependent, you are enhancing your masculine mindset
I’m actually going to encourage you to mentally become a Sigma Male. Why is that? Well because here’s what I really like about having the mindset of a Sigma Male, you don’t follow other people’s lead, you follow your own lead, and you don’t take orders from anyone.
This is what being good enough on your own means. It simply means you are not frame controlled by authorities. You don’t take orders from authorities. Period. This is how to enhance masculinity.
Male stereotypes often pressure men to conform to certain behaviors, which can be detrimental to their mental health and personal growth.
So the first strategy is for you to become your own man. In fact, because society shames masculinity, sigma males don’t even take orders from society. They tune out the shitty conditioning.
However, I don’t want to give you the wrong idea and just be alone your whole life. I simply want you to mentally be good enough on your own because that is the one positive characteristic of the Sigma Male.
The downside to being a Sigma Male is all men live their lives in quiet desperation. There comes a time where have a social circle (In Group Bias) is very important because being a Sigma Male can get lonely very fast and isolation is no good for anybody.
Second Strategy – Set Firm Boundaries
This is where I am going to be blunt with you. In order for you to enhance your mindset, you must know what you will and will not put up with, especially when it comes to behaviors that match society’s definition of manhood.
If you TRULY want to have a masculine mindset, you must know how to set boundaries. But don’t have maliciousness behind it.
You see this is what most guys don’t understand, they think being overbearing and rude is how to set firm boundaries.
That’s not the case, in fact, you’ll come across as a dick. So let’s say for example, a woman tests you by being negative..
And you lash out like a little punk, I’m going to personally make you do my HIIT routine.
Because women are evolutionarily turned off by rage. Here’s how you set firm boundaries if she being negative…
“I have a quick question for you Jessica, since when does being negative achieve a positive outcome? Because the way you’re acting right now, I’m afraid this is a dealbreaker. If you continue this behavior, I think it’s best if we part ways.”
I want you to say that calmly. Because when you’re willing to drop a woman in a very calm way, you go up to being her main guy.
Because here are the facts, a lot of women see more than one guy. And when she see’s that you don’t put up with her BS, and you aren’t being rude or say it in a harsh way, she essentially see’s that you’re not to be fucked with.
That’s how you set firm boundaries with women. The truth of the matter is when you having the balls to say that, it shows that you are non needy.
Not to mention most guys nowadays think this is how you lose attraction. No my friend, you have it ass backwards because you’re afraid of setting boundaries.
Third Strategy – Have A Strong, Masculine Frame
Leading classmates demonstrates masculinity
That goes without saying, you must lead women, but also know how to lead people, generally speaking. This is why I said earlier, I don’t want you becoming an all out Sigma Male because we need dominance hierarchies because we learn from coaches and mentors.
In truth, dominance hierarchies get’s a bad reputation, however, there are positives. For example, if you’ve been divorced and you’re getting back in to the game, hiring a coach will help you get to your goals faster. We learn from mentors.
Circling back to becoming more masculine, leading is a quality of an Alpha Male and most women know when you are Alpha. How do they know? I mean why else do they test you? They want you to pass their tests. It’s because she can feel it her bones that you have a strong masculine presence when you pass her tests by being nonreactive.
You see, being a powerful Alpha Male gets hated on by a lot of people, heck I get some of them in my DMs. But as I read the hate comments, I just think to myself, “you really don’t know the positives of what being masculine can do for a relationship.”
It’s called The Law of Polarity. When you are masculine, she goes deeply in to her feminine and then you have sexual tension. Without that sexual tension, the spark can die.
So those of you waiting to lash out, read this article written by a woman. And you’ll see that there are some women out there that want men to be masculine.
Fourth Strategy – Speak Up For Yourself
Who would have known speaking up can be powerful? Believe me, this will absolutely enhance your masculine mindset. You see, when you speak up for yourself, you feel better about yourself and your confidence goes up substantially.
Young men often struggle with societal expectations of masculinity, making it crucial for them to learn how to speak up for themselves. Similarly, young women face significant challenges due to societal pressures and media portrayals, making it equally important for them to learn to speak up for themselves.
I mean, come on, you are going to want to do this if you aren’t already. The question I’ve got people asking me, “Why won’t people take me seriously?”
I know you’re not going to want to hear this but I have to be upfront with you. The reason people aren’t taking you seriously is because you don’t speak up when you know you should speak up!
What does that result in? People see that you are kinda passive and it make’s you look like you doubt who you are. You don’t want to doubt who you are. I want you to listen to confidence affirmations.
I know for a fact that confidence affirmations will give you the courage to speak up. Listen to it while you sleep brother!
Here are three tips down below on becoming more confident my friend, play the Tik-Tok video below. This next one is a fantastic way to enhance masculinity.
Fifth Strategy – Ask For Favors
How often do you ask for favors? I’ll give you an example. Sometimes I will be at the gym and I will literally ask the one woman that EVERY guy has their eyes on and I will ask, “Can you film me doing pull-ups?”
It’s really not hard to ask for favors. If you’re scared to approach a hot girl at a vitamin store, then conquer your fears and ask her, “Can you let me know where the protein supplements are?” Do this obviously when your shopping. Then you’ll realize that most people are friendly and will help you out.
I mean dude, women are harmless. But you act like they are someone to be prized. Fuck that. You should never place a woman out of your league. Having a masculine mindset requires that you ask everyone for favors and treat all women the same. Don’t misinterpret me and send hate.
What I mean is you treat model type women the same way you treat a 7 or an 8. Because model type women have a different reality than 7’s and 8’s. Just be NORMAL.
This is how to enhance your masculinity. So don’t overlook this my friend. You got this.
Sixth Strategy – Don’t Mentally Masturbate
I’d say mental masturbation is the most common form of being feminine as a man. And don’t take that out of context. What I mean by that is overthinking is what women do. There’s nothing wrong with it but when it’s too much, it’s when men look wishy washy.
So do me a favor, and don’t take this out of context. I am not hating on feminine energy. I’m simply pointing out that mental masturbation is overthinking. And when you overthink too much that it becomes a problem.
That’s why I’ve told you on this blog already that self-sabotage is one of the habits that kills masculinity. If you consistently beat yourself up, it stems from overthinking which is mentally masturbating. Don’t beat off my dude.
You gotta do mental NoFap because it’s not really that healthy when you overthink day in and day out. Again, do not take this the wrong way. If you want to enhance masculinity, it’s simple, stop mentally masturbating.
Seventh Strategy – Master Your Emotions
Here’s my warning, this book will fuck up your mindset, I mean that quite literally. So read this with a very high guard. However, what Robert Green is spot on right about is you MUST MASTER YOUR EMOTIONS.
There’s one thing I’ve never said about getting in to the dating game because it’s a dark secret no one will tell you but I will.
You are playing with fire when you’re dating and seducing women. That fire is your emotions. If you don’t master your emotions, then your masculinity is not as high as it could be. In fact, you’re likely too sprung on a woman.
How do I know that? Even if I don’t know you, I can make an educated guess that you’ve got your heart stepped on by many women. In a way that’s your fault, because you’ve let your guard down too soon and you lost power to women.
Women fall in love slowly, men can often fall in love faster. And that is because of the fact that men are visual creatures. So here’s my suggestion to you, guard your heart. Because the minute you let yourself go, she can break it.
In my mind, this is THE SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT STRATEGY. If you can master your emotions, then you will never be taken an advantage of by anyone. In fact, the dangers of becoming powerful are real.
You will intimidate people with how much you are indifferent. Unless you’ve read the book, you won’t know what I mean. I strongly advise you to read this book as it will change your mindset for better and for worse. It’s a great read, but it’s very dark.
The Bottom Line: 7 Strategies to Enhance Your Masculinity
Apply all of these strategies to enhance your mindset my friend. I’m telling you, it’s going to improve your confidence, charisma, and even make you more bold. What’s more attractive than a man that is bold?
That is highly attractive to all women. And not to mention when you become more emotionally dominant, you will intimidate people. I know this through experience.
However, becoming more emotionally dominant requires discipline and you must get rejected by many people to get there. Quite frankly, most people are terrified of rejection so I want to first start out small.
And you wonder why you mentally masturbate. Nice going man, self-sabotage is a great way to live life. It’s so much fun.
Obviously, I’m being a smart ass but you should know that the more you self-sabotage, the more you are not in control of your emotions.
Your emotions are in control of you. And then your killer instinct can come up and you’ll hurt someone the wrong way with your emotions. practice daily meditation. I fucking mean that, you’ll get out of that mental dark place.
In result, you’ll have a highly enhanced masculine mindset.
Gentlemen, I appreciate your time because you can be doing a million other things so do me the justice of commenting down below.
Because I’m going to mentally masturbate and cry in the fetal position if you don’t.
Obviously I’m pulling your leg, however all jokes aside, I’d appreciate some questions, and concerns down below if you have any
